I almost can’t handle this.
I’m getting so much better at pulling myself out of feeling bad about myself. Thank you for all of your sweet words:-*
I had to rush out of the gym because my boss had an emergency errand for me so I was only working out for 15 mins and when I was running out of there the lady at the desk was like “oh honey you need to exercise much longer your body definitely needs it” and she gave me like an up down implying that my body is like gross of whatever and I get it she was like trying to be motivational or whatever and I binged last night I was waking up being like it’s a new day everything’s cool imma hit the gym hard but now I just feel like a gross monster and I didn’t have time to go home and get ready but I had different clothes in my car and I literally changed while I was driving and these group of guys saw me and were saying sexual things to me and ugh I just feel so uncomfortable itchy in this body blahh wanna b beautiful for real trying to say nice things to myself trying to not let my worth be dictated by other ppl
"Humans can’t live in the present like animals do. Humans are always thinking about the future or the past. So, it’s a veil of tears, man. And I don’t know anything that’s going to benefit me more than love. I just need an overwhelming amount of love. And a nap. Mostly a nap"
Townes Van Zandt March 7, 1944 – January 1, 1997
I have binged shocking amounts every day since Mel died besides yesterday but I’m about to do it again and I don’t know how to stop and I feel out of control and I don’t want to go outside let the world see me I feel so helpless